Mirrors

I've always been a little fascinated by mirrors. The illusion of an alternate reality they create is alluring, especially for a child's mind. I remember, as a kid, staring into the bathroom mirror of my childhood home, imagining it was a portal into a similar but slightly different version of "things as they were." Like Alice in "Through the Looking Glass".

My cat Banjo was similarly convinced of the mirror world's substantiality. He would perch himself in front of full length mirrors and watch the reflections of people in the room as if they were the actual people themselves. The he'd go up on his hind legs and started feverishly scratching at the mirror in a desperate attempt to join everyone on the other side of the "window". It was hilarious...and a little sad. Banjo wasn't the brightest bulb in the bunch.

As an adult I'm still somewhat enticed by the illusion. It's amazing to me what a difference mirrors can make in a small room. Throw one on the wall and suddenly your room appears to double in size. In an instant a flat surface transforms into a lifelike room addition, and a claustrophia-inducing space is expanded into a breathable environment.

Plus mirrors allow you to fix your hair. Very positive.

Art Beyond Boundaries

I love the idea of art for art's sake. Yes, it can be pretentious and way too out of the box sometimes. But the idea of coming up with something that no one else has attempted and then displaying it for the world to see is pretty amazing. At Artscape (The biggest free art festival in the country and only a bike ride away.) they have one strip of really bizarre art. My favorite this year is a human Foosball court, where people are tied together trying to get a big cushioned ball into the other teams goal. The people leading the game are making crazy sound effects as the games go on. Really funny stuff, I'll get some pics of it today.

They also have decorated "art cars", my favorite is one with a million different kinds of cameras attached to every inch of the car. They are very strategically placed so everything lines up perfectly. I thought I had a nice camera collection, but this person wins. I like to think about how these people brainstormed these ideas and how long it took to make their visions come to life. "Today I'm going to start decorating a car with a million cameras", who does that?! I'm betting a lot of artisans of this medium are a bit off their rocker. I really admire and love the idea of people thinking and creating outside the boundaries of the norm and I can't wait to see more of it today.

Power Napping

I love napping, I know it's not the most productive thing to do, but I do love it. I go through a moment of hating myself after I take a nice nap, but really it was great and could do it all the time. Horrible I know. The computer was really acting up this morning, so I had to sit and stare at it for a while, I started falling asleep while doing that, so what did I do, I got up and passed out in my bed for an hour. Now, that I'm writing about it hopefully I won't do it again today. Stay awake Kate!

The Creative Process

I guess I do it all the time, but it still amazes me, this process of creating something from nothing. Every day I stare at a stark white, blank "New Post" form in Blogger and manage to conjure up a cohesive (I hope) entry. For the last almost fifteen years I've spent my days cobbling together commercials, training films, and other corporate communications, often from thin air. It's all gotten easier over time, of course, the process becoming more organic and natural for me. But it's no less mystifying. I often feel like I'm simply along for the ride. A bystander more than an active participant.

I've heard that many artists already know what the project they're working on is supposed to look like. They can see it in their heads, or at least have a strong sense of the final work before they land the first brush stroke. The process of creation then becomes a realization of that vision. They know they're finished when the two images match. For me it's not like that. I do have a vague sense of direction before I start a project. An impression of a potential path. A jumping-off point. But that's it. To chip away at the white space I simply start somewhere and watch along with everyone else as the work develops. I'm usually pretty surprised by the final product, having simply been the button pusher for my subconscious mind.

The creative process, I think, remains both intimate and alien for a large percentage of the people who engage in it. It's a familiar set of experiences that's never the same twice. An extremely active pursuit followed in a sort of haphazard, passive manner. Sort of like shooting baskets at a moving target with your eyes closed, with only muscle memory and vague sense of the space around you as your guides.

Case in point. I never would have guessed I'd be using basketball analogies by then end of this entry.

Show Redemption

I like it when a show I once enjoyed thoroughly comes back and redeems itself, becoming the show I fell in love with again. Both Weeds and So you Think you Can Dance have done that for me this week.

I usually get so engrossed in SYTYCD, loving the dance numbers, the couples energy together, and the unbelievable talent. This year's show has been lacking in all those categories; the couples haven't had much chemistry, everyone is equally talented with no real standouts, and the dance numbers except for maybe two have been a tad boring. Last night Travis, a past winner, choreographed Jeanine and Jason in the most beautiful performance of the season. The dance was incredibly powerful and original. This really redeemed the show for me. I hope to see more powerful numbers like that one after this show. The judges were all in tears it was such a glorious masterpiece. I can't display it on my entry because none of the resources will allow embedding. If you're interested in seeing it you can go to: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65teCIcAAOg

Weeds is a great show and the first three seasons were the best and then seasons four and five have kind of just been too over the top, a bit unrealistic. I felt the old energy and tone of the show coming back to the surface the last two episodes, the relationships are getting more complex and the humor of the show returning. It's still too serious at times, but the drama of it all is more interesting than it's been. I also feel myself falling hard for Andy, the Jewish brother-in-law. He's is so clever and such a cutie. Anyways it's getting good again, I hope it keeps it up.

Chocolate, with Bacon

Sounds strange, right? I thought so, too, but a still, small voice, located somewhere between my brain and my stomach reassured me, and goaded me into trying it. "How could it be bad?", it said confidently, with a small rumbling of hunger to accent its point. "After all, accidental syrup spills onto your breakfast bacon just make a good thing better. How different are syrup and chocolate?"

I couldn't argue. Sweet and savory often make a great combination. I'm not an over-the-top chocolate fan generally, but I like it. And I love bacon. Baconing up anything sounds like a good idea to me. So I tried an eight dollar bar of gourmet medium dark chocolate with bacon pieces scattered throughout.

It was proof that you could add bacon to drywall spackle and have a hit at the Aspen Food and Wine Festival. Bacon illuminates everything good in chocolate. The salty complements the sweet on a basic level, and the smokey notes of meat cradle nicely in the bittersweet dark of the chocolate. It was easily the best (and most expensive) chunk of chocolate I've ever eaten, and I'd recommend it to any chocolate lover. The manufacturer of the bar I had was Vosges Haut-Chocolat. From what I can gather, they removed the "e" in order to make room for the bacon. I'd be more than happy to eat Chocol if it meant even more bacon in the mix.

Ummm...Chocolacon. How about these beautiful looking desserts?

Sasha Baron Cohen the controversial Genius

Sasha Baron Cohen is one gusty SOB. We saw his next controversial film Bruno last night, and it was even more crude than Borat. He is one crazy genius. He pushes all elements to their most extreme boundaries. I'd say I enjoy Borat more than Bruno, but it was still freaking hilarious. He is beyond talented with the way he consumes the characters he portrays. He is fearless and no one pushes the political envelope as far as he does and gets away with it. Did I mention yet that he's another beautiful and brilliant Jew?! He's so hot when he's not in character.

I admire the man for getting to the core of the hate that goes on in this world everyday. He shows how awful people can be. His extreme acts bring the hate people have to the surface, making you realize that deep rooted racism does exist in this world and probably will continue to forever. Cohen at least makes the ignorance known and visible. Thanks Sasha for creating such controversial masterpieces, you are one-of-a-kind and hot as all hell.

Kurt Vonnegut's Eight Rules of Writing Fiction

I discovered these yesterday, through a random tweet from someone I don't know. Vonnegut was one of the greatest writers of the last half decade. Although I haven't read them all yet, I own at least one copy of every one of his novels. Breakfast of Champions is so far my favorite, though a few of his short stories are in close competition. So I was pretty jazzed when I found these, Kurt's Eight Rules for Writing Fiction.

1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.
2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.
3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.
4. Every sentence must do one of two things — reveal character or advance the action.
5. Start as close to the end as possible.
6. Be a sadist. Now matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them — in order that the reader may see what they are made of.
7. Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.
8. Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To heck with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages.

I have to admit that some of these are fairly counter-intuitive for me. And some I don't really understand. Number five falls into that category. Is that telling you to establish a short, shallow story arc? I can't imagine that. It does seem to pair with number eight. If you're giving your readers as much information as possible up front, your essentially rolling out the ending before you get there. Which seems counter-intuitive. To heck with suspense? I always thought suspense was one of the main avenues for tension development. I suppose it aligns with what I've read of Vonnegut. Character studies to the core. His writing is all about the internal life of his characters. The story arc exists primarily as a substrate for Vonnegut to flesh out his players. Numbers two, three, four and six all support this view of writing. I guess there's no harm in giving up the map when it's the mapmakers you're concerned with.

Or is this some sort of devious misdirection?

I need more time to think about this. I'd really like to find an online discussion and read how other people interpret these maxims, especially other professional writers. I might share more when I find it.

Love me some Hosting

I really enjoy throwing small parties at our house. Sunday we threw a brunch for Jae's mom for retiring from teaching. Steph, John, Jackson, Jan, David, and Judy came over. Just the right amount of people. I made roasted potatoes with onion and peppers and I made banana pudding from scratch. All the food was great and everything seemed to go pretty smoothly. I like being the host. Especially cause you can drink all you want and just pass out when everyone leaves without having to decide who drives. And that's exactly what we ended up doing. We had mimosa's, Bloody Mary's, and Southsides for the drinkers to enjoy. I love brunch food and beverages. Jackson was as cute as ever. It was a blast and I can't wait for the next party. Bring it on!

Deep Understanding

It's one thing to know generally how to do something. But it makes a huge difference when you start to get a deep understanding for what's going on behind the scenes, how the process really works.

As an example, I've been doing web design projects on the side, learning as I go. I've been using CSS, or Cascading Style Sheets, more and more, as CSS is now the preferred method for page layout and design. And I've learned how to use it well enough, but on a surface level. I knew which tags I needed to accomplish certain things, but I didn't have a complete understanding of how and why CSS and HTML together were doing what they were doing.

So I started reading about the mechanics below the surface; Why the these mark-up languages were designed the way they were. Their strengths and weaknesses. Ways to integrate the two more fully. I'm slowly developing a much deeper understanding of the process. Not just the how, but also the why. It's making a real difference already. Suddenly thorny little needling "bugs", where my code doesn't perform the way I think it should reveal themselves for what they really are. Not errors in code, but holes in understanding. Code left incomplete because a lack of understanding regarding what was happening below deck.

When you learn a new skill, regardless of what it is, try and go as deep as you can. It's not enough to know just the how, the basic skills. Knowing the why can help quickly get you out of jams, because applications can differ slightly from situation to situation. When elements change in a given system, knowing just the basics will get you stuck. But knowing deeply what's going on allows you to alter your methods without having to relearn new basics. You become more nimble. More effective.

So go deep, ya'll. Go deep.

Fearless Karaoke

I gained real confidence this weekend at my friend Kate's Karaoke Birthday bash. I've always been able to get up there and sing in groups or maybe do one solo as I shook in horror. This time I went with complete confidence, singing multiple songs by myself. I started with the Squeeze song Tempted. As I was singing in this white trash hole in the wall bar, a fight broke out. Guess what I did? I kept my cool and kept on singing. Everyone in our party was proud of me for staying calm and finishing my song. I've got to say that was the first time my voice caused a brawl.

Then I sang PJ Harvey's Down by the Water, which Jason said was my best. I finally chose the right songs for my voice. They were more talky songs with attitude. That's what I need to stick with. I finished the night off with the Violent Femme's song Add it Up. I love singing and this really gave me the chance to feel that energy of the spotlight. I really had a great time.


Jason sang many songs and his voice was amazing as usual. At one point I came out of the restroom and he was doing a duet with this fantastic girl singer. My jealousy went away fast because they sounded so good. I would love to be a girl rock star, but I'll settle with Karaoke every so often. My fears are gone and I'll hopefully forever be able to sing my heart out in front of a bunch of strangers. It's really exhilarating.

Jason's Dime Store (or Nickel Bag) Being-ness Discussion

Last night, by random chance, I came across something that I wrote down years ago. I really don't remember when, or what provided the impetus, but it doesn't really matter. I obviously felt it was important to jot it down then, and knowing the Jason of eight to ten years ago as well as I do, I know why. The current Jason likes the thought just as much, and still has no answer to the question. So I'll share it with you and let you roll it around for a while. This entry falls into the "positive" category because it asks a question that gooses my grey matter just the right way and creates a whole host of other interesting questions. So I'll quote what I wrote first. Then they'll be a discussion period, followed by shortbread cookies and punch at the back of the multi-purpose room.

Here's what I wrote:

Let's say you're involved in an accident and suffer complete amnesia; your name, your past, everything. Not a shred of who you are is left. Is the first question you ask yourself, "Who am I?" or does the fact that you don't know only occur to you when someone else asks you, "Who are you?" In other words, does the human sense of self, stripped of identity, need or seek one automatically? Is it enough to say, "I am" or is it essential that we entwine that with, "and who is that?"

Whoa, Jason, that's off the hook, man. You're blowin' my mind.

Thanks, reader who's reacting to this question exactly as I hoped they would. I love this thought experiment, but until I find someone who's had the experience detailed above, I'll never be able to adequately answer it. It's important though, I think, because it gets at the root of who we are as people. Is our identity a necessary, emergent property of the human mind, or is it just a mask layered over the only real truth we can muster; that we are. That we exist. And not that we are "someone", because that's identity, but just that we are. That we exist as self-aware entities. Small dots of raw awareness bound up in, and inseparable from the small lump of squishy, nerveless brain matter floating in our skulls. What is the identity we've layered over that awareness?

It is just an assemblage of behaviors and reactions to stimuli that we've learned since birth? We come into the world raw, and we're immediately given a name and a back story, as the child of so and so, grandchild to so and so and so and so, etc. From there we slowly learn our relationship to the rest of the world around us. Each and every person. Each object we come into contact with. Each experience we have. As we naturally learn language, and with that the ability to think as we know it, the words and concepts are intimately bound up with the experience of learning. The people that guide us through the process. Our mistakes and successes.

Over a period of a few years we go from being a blank slate to being pretty much the person we're going to be for the rest of our lives, though in an immature, unpolished form. That raises a few questions. Is the infant mind primed to accept an identity, apart from outside influences? From the moment it enters the world, is the baby's awareness seeking out an answer to who it is? Is that "identity adoption" process an automatic response for a naked mind? Would our amnesia patient, stripped of his identity, immediately begin seeking a new one? If that need to identify exists in infants, does it stop once the human brain is fully matured? What part of us is the real us?

Our amnesia patient loses his memories. He loses his past. His name and his back story. But his language is still there. His basic knowledge of the outside world remains. His conceptual reference points for being a person remain. That's the difference between an infant and our amnesia case. The infant can't frame a question. But is the seemingly automatic process of identity adoption a de facto proof that the infant would ask the question if they had the language to do so? Is the question "who am I" the root of awareness, a necessary offshoot of awareness, or unnecessary cultural baggage built up over time?

I don't know. Please, if any of you have any thoughts you'd like to share here, drop them into a comment. I'd love to start a discussion about all this.