Positivity Wrapped Up

Hello followers, thanks for sticking around, we have truly appreciated your support throughout the year. I cannot believe it's now 2010 and that we've managed to complete this experiment to it's fullest. I've never typed this much in my life. I can say that I was only happy with about 60% of my entries which I know is not very positive. But, I'm aware I am not a stellar writer and this brought that more to the surface for me. I prefer to write in fragments, brief thoughts, and poetic verse.

This blog has traveled with me through the start of my photography career, losing my job, nine months of unemployment, my medical assistant pursuit, to my now teaching aspirations, to my new job in day-care, to my beautiful wedding engagement. 2009 couldn't have been more life alternating for me and now I have it completely documented. I've kept up journal writing through most of my younger years and this process has been very therapeutic in that same regard. I feel I know myself better. I feel more confident in my own skin. I think this experiment effected me more deeply than Jason, just because I was writing during such life changing times. I became a stronger person when I was unemployed and got to explore all my passions. I did love and appreciate this experience. I know now that I need calming devises around me when my life gets tense and stressful. Exercise, music, films, and my favorite foods to name a few. I feel more positive, I really do. Whenever I sense Jason getting negative, I catch myself getting negative with him. I don't like when I do this and I'm glad I'm immediately aware of it, so I usually find myself stepping out of the situation and concentrating on the positive.

Top big projects that we need to stay positive about are selling the Towson House, affording all the bills including our two mortgages, getting my teaching certificate and becoming a teacher, getting the city house finished, getting my photography career moving and shaking again, and getting a wedding plans together. We have each other to get through these tough projects. We can achieve anything together.

Things I think of when times get me down: My loving mom and dad, my sister and Allen, and their wonderful growing boys, Kaiden and Blake. My grandmom, who needs positivity more than ever. My new dreams of helping and teaching children achieve and grow. Cooking delicious food with my wonderful fiance, Jason. My new loving family- Jan, David, Steph, John, Lou, Karin, Grandpa, and Jackson. And all of our other family members and friends. Starting a new garden next Spring. Starting any new project with Jason. Finishing our city home together. Being a bride walking down the aisle to my beautiful, kind, heartfelt soon to be husband, Jason.

I love you dear, we can move mountains together. I hope all your writing dreams come true. I believe in you- Stay Positive!

Kids are the Best

It's been so great getting to know my nephews, Kaiden and Blake again. Every time I see them they are so different and more grown up. It's truly amazing how fast they grow. They make me realize more and more that I really fascinated by that age group. I think I'm set on wanting to teach Pre K to 3rd grade. I like when they're young and like to play a lot. I can really tell that my new job is helping me interact and play with my nephews. I think I'm starting to know and understand young minds better. It's just wonderful sharing this quality time with them. They really love playing with Jason and I too.

We went to Kaiden's class Christmas Party today. I got to watch the teachers in action and witness a young classroom environment. It was very insightful and looked like something I could really do and enjoy.

Kaiden and Blake, you are two awesome little boys and I'm so happy to be here to get to spend Christmas with you all.

2010 Resolution Part 1

This blog has really made me realize that keeping yourself motivated is the only way to live a happy, energized, and satisfied life. We must continually strive to educate ourselves. Staying healthy keeps you energized to pursue life's next goals. Staying positive and having confidence in yourself keeps you motivated.

My resolution for 2010 will be to continue this attitude. I have a big interview coming up and I must stay on top of my game so that I can get into the residency program. I'm really starting to feel it's the best step I could make for myself. Lately I've been feeling my scared-protective walls forming around me. I'm losing my momentum so I must break down that wall, step up my game and start focusing on my teaching and photography careers with real passion.

I must feel good, stay focused and motivated, and be confident in myself. It's very important to keep studying, learning, and practicing. I need to stay connected with the strong and loving people in your life. Remember to like yourself and be positive. You are Captain Awesome!!

Brooke, my Motivational Speaker

I got to catch up with my friend, Brooke, today when I decided to give her a ring during the kid's nap time. It was great to finally talk to her. I knew that she was back in NY and really busy pursuing her dreams, but I didn't know all the details. So here you go: she's currently interning for Bust my favorite magazine, she is producing her own comedy shows around the city and in Jersey, she doing art shows presenting her handmade light boxes, and she's back bartending and waiting at a NYC night spot. I really admire her tenacity, she never gives up and will always be an amazingly talented, unique individual. She keeps herself super busy, which is very motivational.

Even with all the things she has going on she kept talking about what my next steps should be with my photography. I wasn't in a rut quite yet, but I could see myself getting there. But now after our talk I feel more self-confident and have new motivation to stay positive as I pursue my photography and my teaching aspirations. Brooke and I are very similar in our work ethic and dedication and I just have to remember that everyday. Miss and Love you Brooke, break a leg!

One Down, Substituting Closely Approaching

One test down, one more to go, and then if I pass them both I need to decide if I really want to become a teacher. I really don't know how I did today, it was pretty tough and hard to decipher the outcome. But one is down and many more trial and errors to go. Oh life, isn't it grand. Sorry this isn't a very positive entry, but this is the best I could do today.

On another positive note, my cousin Darra, who teaches at a Parkville Public Elementary School called me and will keep me in mind when they need substitutes. I need the experience in the classroom to know if this is my true calling. Wish me luck.

Teaching --Here I come!

I have recently pushed through the barrier that's been keeping me from pursuing the teaching profession. I don't know if it's my dream to be a teacher and I won't know until I give it a try. Until I'm in a physical classroom with a bunch of 7 year olds, I will have no idea if it's a good fit for me. I've had the benefits and disadvantages going through my head for weeks, none can even be confirmed until I get started and know the reality of the job. I need to stay focused, I've signed up to substitute teach in both the county and the city. I've decided to apply for the Baltimore City Residency Program, which is honestly the only way for me to afford schooling in becoming an Elementary Teacher. It will be a challenge I know this and I feel I am up for it, now all I have to do is convince the program folks that I am the gal they need. I've signed up to take the Praxis I the third week in September, giving me plenty of time to study. I've signed up to take a CPR class for young kids, which will benefit when I apply for Daycare and after school tutoring jobs in the fall, as I wait for my application to be processed. I can do this and feel confident as I pursue this new path.

Palpable Anticipation

This weekend is living up to its promise. Yesterday was incredibly productive. We got through all of Kate's photos and made final selects for her portfolio. I tried hanging our remaining ceiling fans but needed some screws and got stopped by the closing of Ace Hardware. No worries. They'll go in today. Kate's photo gig got rescheduled on account of rain, so we have a little more time today.

But that's not what this entry is about. It's about the palpable anticipation we both feel regarding upcoming endeavors. Getting Kate's portfolio done is breathing reality into the business. The fact that we'll finally be able to advertise for paying gigs is incredibly exciting. It makes all of her previous free gigs feel worth the effort, providing great photos for a professional portfolio. We bought the URL www.luminouseyephoto.com last night, so we should have the site live by this evening.

Plus, Kate's now firmly committed to her new career path. She's applying for substitute teaching positions as well as getting everything in place to begin training to be a full-time elementary ed teacher. Scary? Yes. Exciting? Even more so.

I'm doing web design for a few companies, and hope to expand it to more.

And, as if that's not all enough, Kate and I are going into the soap business. Why? Because we can, and because everybody needs soap. It's cheap to make, cheap to buy and a commodity that's always in demand. As I said in my last soap entry the chemistry involved is really interesting to me, and Kate is jazzed about cooking up new scent combinations. We've been spitballing ideas for names, products, marketing plans, etc. I bought a few soap-making books from Amazon, which should be arriving Monday. Then the experimenting begins. I'm sure we're months off from having anything to sell, but the excitement has already arrived.

Here's a contest. Send us your ideas for soap company names. They can be serious, funny, light-hearted, witty...whatever. If we pick your name you'll get a whole raft of free soap...when that soap gets made, whenever that is.*

There's a lot of good, new stuff cooking at the Karbownibloom household. Our philosophy? Throw as many balls into the air as possible and see which ones get caught.

*Raft meaning, "a sizable quantity". You will not be receiving a rubberized rowboat full of soap. That's both dangerous for the soap and a quantity far to sizable for us to give away.

New Horizons Approaching

Okay I'm finally getting excited enough about my new career proposal to talk about it in my blog. I want to teach Elementary Education. I'm going to apply to two different fast track programs, but they won't be starting up for a while. I keep imagining myself in front of a bunch of 2nd graders and it's making me nervous and excited at the same time. I have a lot of teacher contacts including Jason's mom who will be able to help me through the process. I've been applying for daycare type jobs for extra experience and even though I don't have any background other than babysitting I got a response today from one of the ads. It doesn't make me feel very nervous to talk to them further, but more excited and happy to be doing something I feel good about. I going to continue doing freelance photography gigs, since that also makes me happy. Give me luck everyone. I have a lot of hard work ahead of me, but right now I feel it will all by worth it.

Getting the Credit You Deserve

Sometimes nothing feels better than getting recognition for a job well done, especially when that credit comes from people who understand just what it took to realize your accomplishment. My Mom got to have that experience last night, and I got to witness it.

After teaching in the Montgomery County Public School system for 13 years, and after a an exemplary professional career that started back in 1969 (I'm pretty sure that's what she said) my Mom is retiring. Last night the school system honored all of its 2009 retirees with a ceremony and reception. Luminaries and high-ranking officials from inside the organization, including the school superintendent and the county executive, showed up to honor the "graduates." Like any good commencement each retiree walked the stage as their name and position was announced, shook hands with the notables, and received a nice leaded glass trophy inscribed with the year of their retirement. Mom was very much touched by the whole occasion.

She's had a stellar career, with nothing but high marks and piles of praise from her colleagues, principals, parents and students. Until the last two years or so, she'd never gotten any sort of negative feedback about her teaching skills. Then a new, young principal, wet behind the ears and seemingly vacant in-between, started at her school. Ageist and determined to cut budget he began persecuting the older, more expensive teachers, trying to force early retirement. I'm not exaggerating at all when I say that he made my Mom's work life hell, with constant badgering, negative reviews, and horribly unrealistic expectations and demands. It was a war, and it strongly took its toll on Mom, mentally and physically.

Many times she considered taking early retirement just to put an end to the torturous days and undue insults her principal inflicted on her. A lesser person would have folded, and some of her colleagues did, unfortunately. But Mom was determined to follow her plan and retire when she wanted to, not when some pip-squeek megalomaniac with a Napoleon complex wanted. And, more than anything else, she wanted to make sure that his persecutions didn't affect her students' education. So she stuck it out, and as of this coming Wednesday, she'll be a retired teacher able to stand tall knowing she did her best her entire career. She weathered her adversities, kept her integrity and honor intact, and turned out thousands of students better prepared than they may have been otherwise for having had my Mom as a teacher.

Congratulations, Mom. I'm proud of you.