Positivity Wrapped Up

Hello followers, thanks for sticking around, we have truly appreciated your support throughout the year. I cannot believe it's now 2010 and that we've managed to complete this experiment to it's fullest. I've never typed this much in my life. I can say that I was only happy with about 60% of my entries which I know is not very positive. But, I'm aware I am not a stellar writer and this brought that more to the surface for me. I prefer to write in fragments, brief thoughts, and poetic verse.

This blog has traveled with me through the start of my photography career, losing my job, nine months of unemployment, my medical assistant pursuit, to my now teaching aspirations, to my new job in day-care, to my beautiful wedding engagement. 2009 couldn't have been more life alternating for me and now I have it completely documented. I've kept up journal writing through most of my younger years and this process has been very therapeutic in that same regard. I feel I know myself better. I feel more confident in my own skin. I think this experiment effected me more deeply than Jason, just because I was writing during such life changing times. I became a stronger person when I was unemployed and got to explore all my passions. I did love and appreciate this experience. I know now that I need calming devises around me when my life gets tense and stressful. Exercise, music, films, and my favorite foods to name a few. I feel more positive, I really do. Whenever I sense Jason getting negative, I catch myself getting negative with him. I don't like when I do this and I'm glad I'm immediately aware of it, so I usually find myself stepping out of the situation and concentrating on the positive.

Top big projects that we need to stay positive about are selling the Towson House, affording all the bills including our two mortgages, getting my teaching certificate and becoming a teacher, getting the city house finished, getting my photography career moving and shaking again, and getting a wedding plans together. We have each other to get through these tough projects. We can achieve anything together.

Things I think of when times get me down: My loving mom and dad, my sister and Allen, and their wonderful growing boys, Kaiden and Blake. My grandmom, who needs positivity more than ever. My new dreams of helping and teaching children achieve and grow. Cooking delicious food with my wonderful fiance, Jason. My new loving family- Jan, David, Steph, John, Lou, Karin, Grandpa, and Jackson. And all of our other family members and friends. Starting a new garden next Spring. Starting any new project with Jason. Finishing our city home together. Being a bride walking down the aisle to my beautiful, kind, heartfelt soon to be husband, Jason.

I love you dear, we can move mountains together. I hope all your writing dreams come true. I believe in you- Stay Positive!

Be Thankful Everyday

Well it was a very fulfilling weekend, but I think I'm going to touch upon an event that occurred a few days ago. The subject matter is not a positive one, but the end result is something to be thankful for. My sister and my two beautiful nephews were in a terrible car crash Thursday. Blake and Kerri walked away with scratches and bruises and Kaiden had to stay over night at the hospital for observation. He was just in pure shock, so they were concerned he might have a concussion. Kerri was such a strong and loving mother the whole time. She's an amazing lady.

Everyone is now still shaken up and beat and battered some, but overall doing amazingly well. Let's be completely thankful everyday for all the loving family we have in our life. It was so terrifying getting that phone call. All you can do is hope and pray that everyone makes it out alive and healthy. Thanks to good car manufacturing and well structured car seats and seat belts my family is still here with me today. I am so unbelievably thankful. We must continue to talk to and if you can hug the people that we hold deep to our hearts everyday. I love you Kerri, Kaiden, and Blake. This too shall pass and before you know it the bruises will be healed and life will back to its beautiful state.

GrandBob and Grandma

During my families visit I got to witness my parents play the grandparent roles. They were so affectionate with the kids, it was the most precious thing to witness.

Blake is drawn to his GrandBob, that's my dad's new nickname, and it's so cute. Mom becomes a kid again and plays with them both for hours. I really feel having these new additions to their life has brought out the absolute best in them both.

They are in the process of looking for a new house near Kerri and the kids. I'm so jealous that they will soon be able to see them grow up day by day. But, I'm also very happy for them. Kerri's going to have babysitters right near by which is fantastic. Too bad Jason and I aren't the biggest fans of Florida. We'll visit of course, but living there is out of the question. GrandBob and Grandma you are the most loving grandparents, Kaiden and Blake couldn't have ask for better.

Young cousins

I love seeing cousins playing together for the first time. You hope that they will continue to be good friends for life. Of course they do live far away from each other, but the hope and the connection is strong.

On Kerri's last day we went over our cousin Amanda's house to catch up and for the kids to meet and play together. They started off on a good start, but our boys were hungry and tired which never ends well. They wanted to keep all the fun toys, so it was a struggle getting them out. They at least played nicely with their cousins for a bit. They were so cute all together. Here's are some pics of their playtime.

The Walker's Visit

These past few days spent with my sister's family have been great. They are such amazing company. You got my crazy sister, Kerri, always keeping things in order with every one's best interests in mind. She's a lot of fun, I love her dearly. Then you got Allen, the chilled out guy with a great sense of humor. He believes in the mellow ways of life, which I really appreciate. The addition of the two boys has added a great deal of amusement. They are both complete joys to be around. The quiet, Kaiden has a loving demeanor and has a a lot of wisdom before those beautiful blue eyes. He's currently obsessed with bugs and I gave him a bug catcher belt with a magnifier, that he loves. I got really lucky, I had no idea he was so into bugs. Then outgoing Blake will get you laughing for hours with his funny sayings and crazy antics. He is definitely Kerri's double. I can't wait to see what he comes up with next. I hope I get to be around for as many funny moments as I possibly can.

I love you all very much, you are always welcome in our home. Can't wait till next time.

Houseguests

Kerri and Allen's visit has been really great. It's nice having other people around the house to spend time with. Last night, on a whim, Allen and I went out and got two dozen crabs from a place literally right around the corner from us (we can walk there, which is excellent for us and dangerous for our wallets.) Plus Kerri got a Mojito recipe from the waitress at Miss Shirley's when we'd been there the day before for brunch. She whipped up a batch, we set up a table in the backyard, sipped our beverages and had a feast while the kids ran around in the neighbor's scrubby yard looking for worms and bugs. The weather was perfect, the company was top choice...it was a great evening.

The value* of having a place of your own can be measured by how much you can share it with other people. I think that's what makes a house a home. Having company and houseguests adds a layer of warmth and memories to a house that wouldn't otherwise exist. Stated more esoterically, reality is based on each person's perception of it. The more your home exists in the minds and memories of other people the stronger a claim on existence your home has. It's stake in the realm of human experience gets larger each time it's shared with other people, and that, in a weird way, validates its existence.

That's probably all mumbo jumbo. But one thing's certain. We had a great time with Kate's whole family this weekend, and we hope to see Kate's parents, Kerri, Allen and the kids again sooner rather than later.


*Emotional value...it would be great if Kerri, Allen and Kate's parent's time here added to our resale value, but unless it's Brad and Angelina that visits you, or a magical leprachaun, I think that's unlikely.

New Perspectives

Exploring different rooms in your home can be so interesting. Jason and I are sleeping in our guest room this week so Kerri, Allen, and Kaiden can have our larger room. We put one of the new ceiling fans in here and we set up the 2nd floor patio that is right off this room. It's also on the quiet side of the house, so no more being woken up by helicopters or ambulances from the hospital down the street. It almost feels like we're on vacation, too. Venturing out and exploring different perspectives of your home or neighborhood can be such a trip. I really recommend it. It was especially cute when my nephews came in to wake me up.

Another Case of Extremes

There's almost nothing better, after a long day of sweating and getting coated in dirt and plaster dust, than taking a shower and getting off all the grit. It's another case of extremes amplifying each other. You don't really appreciate getting clean until you've been really, really grimy. I'll give a shout out to my peeps in the middle ages. They know what I'm talking about.

And speaking of extremes, we made so much progress on the house this weekend. It really finally feels like a home, and not a constant construction zone. And we appreciate the difference. A lot. If any of you ever want to take a look and come hang out for a while, shoot us an email. It's an open invitation (except to you readers we don't know — you'll need to pass a two-hour screening process and a thorough background check before entering the premises. Please bring an exhaustive family tree, cross-referenced with disease and crime histories...and be welcome.)

Our first visitors will be arriving this Wednesday. Kate's parents, sister, brother-in-law and two nephews are coming into town. Can't wait, guys!

Anticipation of Family

I can't wait to see my family in a week. Like I've mentioned they are coming for Joe (my cousin) and Kaitlyn's wedding. Kerri, the kids, and Allen are staying with us. The house is coming along pretty smoothly. We will have most of it done by the time they get here Wednesday night. I just can't wait to see them all. The boys have gotten so big, both are talking like crazy. I'll probably have a similar entry when they actually get here, but first the anticipation is my positive. I also can't wait to see my mom and dad. I miss them so much, it's going to be wonderful. They finally get to see the life Jason and I have created in Baltimore.

Babysitting

I got to be a mother for the first time last night. Jason, my mom, dad and I got to watch the kids through the night into this morning, so that Allen and Kerri could spend a romantic night out alone. I had night duty and got up and rocked Blake back to sleep at 11, 2, and 3 am. It felt really sweet to be needed and putting him back to sleep wasn't too hard. I really liked watching my nephews. They have become so much more animated since the last time we saw them. They are both talking a bit and are so much fun. I know being a mother is difficult, but it has to feel good to see and feel that need for your affection everyday. Again, I'm not saying I want kids right away, but the idea and want is present. For now I'll settle with watching my two amazing Nephews, they are growing so fast and hate to miss a minute of it. I love you, Blake and Kaiden, thanks for putting your trust in me.

70 Degree Weather

I love 70 degree weather. We arrived in Tampa today to visit my whole family, and the weather's been perfect. Come in the the summer months and you drown in your own sweat. It's horrible. I guess that's why you go to Florida during the cold months. A light breeze and you can choose to wear a light jacket or not. I've never been to California, but I've heard they have, in parts, perfect 70 degree weather all year round. I need to visit and experience this so called perfect weather for myself and because I've always wanted to visit there. Alright, so 70 degree weather is the bomb diggity.

Kind Creatures

My pets fascinate me, so many animals fascinate me. They can be so lovable right when you need them most, they are always there for you and they can be so darn cute. I love my three cats dearly. Midnight, is my cat and she's the queen of the house, she rules the castle by being the moodiest and most demanding. But, she can be the cutest sweetheart if you pet her right and give her food.

Jason's Siamese cat, DB., has the most striking looking features, he is a real cuddle bug and the most endearing cat in the house (he sleeps in-between Jason's legs every night, it can get kind of cumbersome sometimes). Jason and I consider him our baby and until recently he was the one with the most medical issues.

Jason's coolest cat, Banjo, recently started showing signs of illness, when we picked him up a few weeks ago and he was skin and bone. Comes to find out he hadn't eaten at all in the past few days. Now since then, we've been giving him hunger stimulates and feeding him manually, and he still hasn't eaten on his own and is getting more and more sick looking. This entry goes out to Banjo, just a couple months ago he could perform some crazy, scaling acrobatics, he was fearless, and always so chill. He is the King of the House, and really admire his strength and the confidence he always carried. Banjo, I love you dearly. I heard a phrase from my darling sister, who very recently had to sadly put her two loving boxer dogs down; that pets teach us about two things: they teach you how to love and they teach you about death.