Flavored artificial coffee creamers occupy a very warm place in my heart. And my stomach. They've become an integral part of my morning routine, and their absence is hard felt when I run out and forget to repurchase.
I like coffee on its own. I do. But only really good coffee has the legs, for me, to stand naked, but for a coat of half and half and a lump of sugar. And no coffee ever goes completely buck naked down my gullet. Black coffee, for me, is exactly like sucking on a bar of completely unsweetened chocolate. No one does that except ascetic monks in Hershey, PA.
The coffee we have at work is great because it's free. But that's its only redeeming quality. It smells like burnt shell casings, and tastes as if it was brewed two decades ago using a hobo's tube sock for a filter. Flavored coffee creamers are the only thing standing between me, that coffee, and gangrene of the throat.
Okay. So that's a bit overly dramatic. The coffee isn't remotely that bad. But it isn't great. And since I enjoy a cup of coffee every morning, it presents a great opportunity to try the huge assortment of flavors available in today's coffee creamer arsenal.
If I had to pick a top five, it would be, in particular order, White Chocolate Coconut, Italian Sweet Creme, Mint Chocolate, Raspberry Something or Other (I can't exactly remember), and plain old French Vanilla. But there are so many good choices. You could have a different flavor everyday and not run out until you did.
I'm sure they're not good for me, though. Artificial coagulants and sugar drenched chemical flavorings are probably just the beginning of what you shouldn't be putting in your body. But I'm taking the risk because of the love content. 200% of your daily recommended value of warmth and goodness. That's hard to beat.
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